BLOGGER TEMPLATES AND TWITTER BACKGROUNDS

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The More Things Change.... The More They Stay the Same

All my life, my relationship with my sisters can best be labeled "strained". I have two older sisters, who happen to be identical twins. They are five years older than me, blonde, hair, blue eyes, Christy Brinkley look alikes. Scary. It was a lot to live up to, being their sister, and somehow, I never quite measured up.
I guess at some point I stopped trying and became the "antithesis" to all things that they were or that I thought they were. Neither seeking acceptance or pretending that I didn't care about it was a very good course of action for me.
Finally, as I grew into my own, I stopped caring what others thought, stopped overtly seeking approval and learned to live for myself.
Or so I thought. Fast track to this past week with my sister.... It's amazing how quickly I feel myself sinking back into the same habits, the same thought patterns, the same need for approval. It sort of sickens me really how, even now, approval is something that I would like to have. i thought I was beyond all this. I guess some things never change.

1 comments:

Ann M. said...

I have a brother like this--the younger one. Normally we don't get along AT ALL and I don't care what he says about anything. But if I'm home for a couple of days, I find myself looking for approval from him on some things. I don't get it either. I wish I had some advice on this, but I don't. Just thought you might want to know you're not alone in doing this.