Saturday, October 6, 2007


My husband's home and you would think that I would be on the top of the world, right? Well, yes.... and no. I am so happy that he's here but every time he comes home, I do feel a gulf of seperation between us. It isn't anything that either one of us creates, it just exits. I don't know how to fix it. Reintergration sucks. Especially when it is so very temporary.

He wasn't home for five hours before he started talking to me about money. I hate talking about money, mostly because it is never a pleasant conversation. But seriously, after being home five hours? Really?? I mean, it's not like there isn't anything else to talk about. He hasn't even wished me happy birthday yet. I mean, he did over e-mail but seriously, not even I'm sorry I missed your birthday. I don't even want to celebrate now. I'm not doing that to be small, I know it may sound that way, but seriously, the moment has just passed. You know?

I'm just hurt and upset and frustrated.... Today is a birthday party for a friend's little girl. She is one of the wives from my husband's submarine. I would really have liked for him to come with me. He doesn't want to - I get it. After all, he just got home and probably the last thing that he wants to do is go to a birthday party. But honestly? The last thing that I really want to do is go to one more event like this with two kids - ALONE. Frankly that is enough of my life already. Why should I have to do it when he's here?


Anonymous said...

Snow, I've never heard you complain about your husband before. You really are normal aren't you?
I hate the money topic too, causes us to fight too much.
Enjoy the time you do have with him.
And Snow's dh welcome home.

Sandy said...

A good friend of mine is married to the military too. I remember when her husband was deployed to Iraq the first time three years ago she surprised me by saying that she'd rather they skipped the whole "mid-point leave." She confessed that it was simply too hard to watch him leave again just as they finally adjusted to being whole. The more I hear families like Mandy's express the same thing in one way or another, the more it slowly sinks in for me -- exactly what she meant.

I'm sorry.

Asten said...

Hi Snow (long time no chat) ;)

I'm not a military wife, but I've been a trucker's wife. It's not fun having hubby gone so long then trying to fit 2 weeks of catch-up into 2 days! At least that's how it is with us. I know it's even harder when your dh goes out for months at a time and comes home for a week :(